Rohan Pain Index
What is RPI?
RPI or the Rohan Pain Index, is a compilation of the measures of Physical, Emotional and Psychological pain that certain actions, events or objects inflict on humans. I am willing to sacrifice my happiness for the field of science and I hope that the scientific community acknowledges these sacrifices when they are deliberting for the Nobel Prize for Medicine. It would also be great, if I get the TIME Person of the Year award for all of this.
These Rankings should not be seen as a bunch of personal opinions, but rather as a universally accepted scale for pain. If someone disagrees with these rankings, then they are simply wrong.
Scoring Criteria
The Rohan Pain Index has 3 different measurement categories for each process/thing :
- Physical Pain Score - This measures the Physical pain inflicted by the process/thing.
- Emotional Pain Score - This measures the Emotional damage sustained during the process/thing.
- Pissed-off Score - This measures how much the process/thing will piss you off.
All of the three measurement categories are measured on a scale ranging from 1-to-10. This scale is logarithmic.
For all of you non-science peeps, a logarithmic scale means that a score of 4 is 10 times as much as a score of 3.
RPI Scores
Stubbing your pinky toe
Pain Scores- Physical Pain Score: 3.2
- Emotional Pain Score: 1
- Pissed Off Score: 4.6
SAGES Essay
Pain Scores- Physical Pain Score: 1
- Emotional Pain Score: 10
- Pissed Off Score: 10
Attending Ethics Lectures
Pain Scores- Physical Pain Score: 1
- Emotional Pain Score: 4.7
- Pissed Off Score: 1.2
Ravens Losing a game
Pain Scores- Physical Pain Score: 1
- Emotional Pain Score: 4.4
- Pissed Off Score: Fire Greg Roman
Drinking Swiss Miss
Pain Scores- Physical Pain Score: 2.2
- Emotional Pain Score: 2.5
- Pissed Off Score: 5.5
Running out of Soap
Pain Scores- Physical Pain Score: 1
- Emotional Pain Score: 10
- Pissed Off Score: 4
Communists and Hippies
Pain Scores- Physical Pain Score: 1
- Emotional Pain Score: 2.5
- Pissed Off Score: 10
Lemon on an open wound
Pain Scores- Physical Pain Score: 2.9
- Emotional Pain Score: 1
- Pissed Off Score: 2.1
Socializing with strangers
Pain Scores- Physical Pain Score: 1.5
- Emotional Pain Score: 3.6
- Pissed Off Score: 3.1
Java
Pain Scores- Physical Pain Score: 1
- Emotional Pain Score: 4.5
- Pissed Off Score: 5.5
Eating Leutner Food
Pain Scores- Physical Pain Score: 6.5
- Emotional Pain Score: 2.3
- Pissed Off Score: 1
Getting your foot snapped between chairs
Pain Scores- Physical Pain Score: 5.1
- Emotional Pain Score: 1.4
- Pissed Off Score: 2.1
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